Fanfic - SPN: Feather Worn (PG-13, Slash: Sam/Gabriel)

[writingbyebonio]

Title: Feather Worn
Author: eboniorchid
Fandom: Supernatural
Characters: Sam Winchester/Gabriel (archangel)
Prompt: "Supernatural, Gabriel/Sam or Dean/Castiel, 'wear my feather'" for kijikun over at comment_fic.
Word Count: ~940 words.
Rating: PG-13 for violence and mature themes.
Warnings/Spoilers: Angst! Apocalypse. Future. Character death. Violence. Established relationship. Plot. Slash. Comment!fic.
Disclaimer: I own nothing. Really. Nothing.
Summary: In the end days, Gabriel sanctions Sam as his messenger with a feather like no bird alive.
Author's Notes: I'm experimenting with angels (heh). Don't mind me.

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It was strange, looking on this creature of God's creation and knowing that even he, tainted soul-deep, was more loved and more cherished, his will beautiful in a way that Gabriel's natural compliance could never truly be. He closed his eyes against the ache of it, knowing far too well how Lucifer could rage at this eternal truth. It didn't really matter, though, his love for his father was greater always than his love of his own pride and he knew now, way deep down, that the current state of affairs was not his father's chosen way.

"Sam." He dropped the sarcasm and the play as he opened his eyes, less the trickster and more the angel that he was born to be. "I need you to wear my feather so that my father will know that I'm the one who sent you … so that he'll listen and return. Will you do that for me?"

Quiet but determined, Sam nodded. "Of course."

Gabriel held his lips tight together for a moment before saying truth that he wished he could just wave away. "… It will burn against you for a lifetime, because your choices have been dark."

The flash of rebellion in Sam's eyes sparked as it would always, though the pain and sadness covered it before his nostrils could flare or his mouth could sneer defiantly. He'd learned, too well, to hide his bitter guilt. "Fine." His voice wavered, but he strengthened it with the setting of his shoulders. "I'll- ... I'll deal."

Gabriel found his fingers seeking Sam's shirt, his jacket-flanked chest, and whispered against the lips he'd caused to tremble with hurt and swallowed self-directed anger. "It doesn't mean I love you any less."

Sam kissed him in earnest, then, devotion as much as passion welling up from his heart to make both of their mouths ache with the intensity. His hand found the angel's nape and pressed him close, which Gabriel allowed until he couldn't anymore.

"Sam ... stop."

"Come with us."

"You know I can't. The sanctuary is for mortals only, all except for God."

"Well ... walk us to the gates then. Or- ..." Sam was back to pleading and it never sat quite right on his face, but the angel shook his head again and waved his partner's voice into the ether until he could say his final peace.

He struggled not to look away, the trickster that he'd cultivated underneath his skin begging to make light of things that required too much gravity. "I can't give you a feather from my wings unless they've been broken, unless my spark has … split … and ended."
Sam's eyes widened, silent mouth moving impotently, forming words like 'no' and 'don't' and 'what about …?'. He grabbed the angel and shook him by the shoulders, his expression twisting with the anger and arrogance of heroes who'd been trained to believe that there were always other ways.

"No, Sam. Castiel has all but fallen. He's … out of sync. Our father won't believe someone carrying his mark and there's no one else who can give you what you need … no one willing." For an eternity spent between obedience and self-made entertainment, it was strange to suddenly feel brave, but Gabriel reveled in it, built his far-too-worldly smile on it. "If my father thinks I'm worthy, he'll raise me up again. I'm willing to take that chance to get you to him safely, to … make sure he listens even if y'all are a pretty ragtag bunch." Okay, so maybe, he couldn't walk away without letting his eyes twinkle, mirthful, one last time.

Loosening his grip on the angel's shoulders, Sam glared a long time after that, but finally turned his eyes away, his teeth clenched tight, hating it and understanding, both at once.

Gabriel imagined that his throat had dried and cracked like an ancient scroll, his smile now a lie. "Close your eyes." You've seen me for the last time. Everything in and around him seemed soaked in bitter and sweet in equal measure.

Shining glassy dots settled at the edges of Sam's eyes as his mouth shaped itself to words the angel's ego didn't make him miss or strain to hear. "... I love you."

They both echoed breaths that they'd yanked in, shivery and quick. Gabriel was the one to finally end it, though, to pull the curtains over Sam's needing, seeking eyes with a hand that came away wet, knowing it would never be done otherwise. Then, he fought the fabric of Sam's shirt and shoved it up to feel the body warm under his hand, and as they stood together, breathed together, both their muscles shook beneath facades too fragile to hold onto.

"Gabriel ... please …"

The pain there, the aloneness that had seeped its way into Sam's marrow only to rupture up again, made the angel want to scream, to choke, to beg his departed father for a way to let him stay and be a comfort to this most penitent of His prodigal sons. Instead, though, he just closed his eyes and pressed fingers made of Heaven's purifying fire into his mortal charge and mortal lover. He listened to Sam's scream as it roared in every ear for acres, wild like the collected souls of Hell, and he wept his love, like liquid flame into the wound he left behind. Then Gabriel, as he was called, an archangel, bright and bold as all his kin, shrank and broke and faded as his lightning, the last of him a brilliant gold, sparked claims across Sam's skin.

Comments

[kijikun.livejournal.com]

Still love this as much as I did the first time I read it. Beautiful and achey.

[writingbyebonio.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much! It was a great prompt! :D

[extremespndiva.livejournal.com]

God this was sad and I loved it so much!

[writingbyebonio.livejournal.com]

Thank you! It was achey to write! :)

[demondean.livejournal.com]

I will read it as soon as I get back from work. Something to look forward to. :)

[writingbyebonio.livejournal.com]

Dude, what'd you think? *hugs* Did I ever get back to you about that thing? I will so beta for you, just email me.

[demondean.livejournal.com]

Damn so sorry I forgot to get back to you. :/ It wasn't my fault really. Just this piece. The way you wrote it. I just really dunno what to say not to mundane it cause it was just really brilliant. I love these flash type of stories almost as much as I like epic backgrounds. It's just this one moment picked out and presented while so much stays hidden, is hinted to, we can guess. I liked the use of language and it again, for me as a not native reader almost struck with it's complexity and yet it's so flowing and once you can grasp it all it really almost like a painting where each detail is unique and interesting and as a whole they form this beautiful and complex puzzle.

Anyway -- am I making sense? I think not. I should probably stop harassing your journal now. :)

*blinks* You would beta for me? Dude -- it would be all kinds of levels of awesome. *is tempted to compose that mail right now thou it's 2 AM and my caffeinated hyper-power is running out* *sigh* So I'm afraid I have to wait another six sleep hours with it and then I can make your life a living hell of non-plot and bad grammar interesting. ;)

*hugs you back*

So I'm off to sleep and will mail you the story tomorrow morning. (Which might be your night given the timezones thing... Well anyhow -- about six hours later.)

[writingbyebonio.livejournal.com]

What a beautiful description of this piece. Thank you! It means a lot! :)

P.S. I facepalmed and then emailed you about the beta job. Sometimes I'm really dense.

[sweetsyren.livejournal.com]

Oh so beautiful. Aching and painful but still beautiful.

Great stuff!

[writingbyebonio.livejournal.com]

Thank you very much! I was definitely in an ambient kind of poetic mood, so I'm glad it worked.

[noctemus.livejournal.com]

Heartbreaking and beautiful. I even had tears in my eyes as I read it. Will you continue it? pretty please?

[writingbyebonio.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much! As for a continuation, I'm not sure. This is really a pairing that I'm just experimenting with, so I'm not sure where I'd take them exactly (though I have some ideas).

[jedi-diplomat.livejournal.com]

Wow...that was some beautiful prose there.

[writingbyebonio.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much! I'm glad you liked it! :D

[enchantersnight.livejournal.com]

Oh I'm crying now damn you!

Is there going to be more? *is a glutton for punishment*

[writingbyebonio.livejournal.com]

Awwww! I'm sorry! I'm glad it moved you, though! And I'm not sure about more right now. I have a few ideas, but I'm working on a lot of other stuff. Thanks for asking, though!

[la-sigh.livejournal.com]

What an interesting idea ! Very well done !

[writingbyebonio.livejournal.com]

Thank you muchly! It just kind of came to me, like with that whole archangel lightning thing that the other archangel did that one time. *nods* Yeah. :)

[haruka89.livejournal.com]

More! More, more, more!!! Please?!?!?! *puppy dog eyes*

[writingbyebonio.livejournal.com]

Oh, honey, I don't know! I do have some ideas and I'm glad you like it enough to want more, but I don't know when I'll ever get to it! :)

[quantumdoll.livejournal.com]

Wow, that was unbelievably gorgeous and heartbreaking. I may have shed a tear for these poor boys!

[writingbyebonio.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much! I just started writing and all this angst came out! Glad it worked, though!

[paper-legends.livejournal.com]

Ooooooooooooooh. Mooooooooooooore.

Also: braaaaaaains.

Ahem. I mean, yay!

[writingbyebonio.livejournal.com]

Haha! Well, I don't know about brains for eating, but my brain is stirring with some thoughts about a future installment, we'll see. A million things to do, you know, but thanks so much for letting me know you liked it! :)

[heliokleia.livejournal.com]

Soooo sad. But also sooooo lovely.
*nods**nods*

"an archangel, bright and bold as all his kin, shrank and broke and faded as his lightning, the last of him a brilliant gold, sparked claims across Sam's skin."
- What a beautiful image, my dear, thank you very much for sharing - and who knows...
maybe, if we all try "Teh Puppy-Dog-Eye-Thing" on you, you'll give us a sequel??^^
*tries to blink innocently*
♥

[writingbyebonio.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much! It just seemed like the more love I dug up for these guys, the more angst was hidden underneath! As for a sequel, I dunno, we'll have to see. *tries not to get sucked in by the puppydog eyes*

[sistabro]

Oh that is just lovely. More please?

[writingbyebonio.livejournal.com]

Thank you! I'll see what my muse feels like. Maybe she'll decide more's a good way to go! :D

[britomart-is.livejournal.com]

Such an interesting pair!

[writingbyebonio.livejournal.com]

Thank you! It's my first time writing them, but I've seen them around fandom with increasing regularity these days. :)

[lostandalone22.livejournal.com]

This is an interesting pairing. I don't think I've read anything from this one. Great story!

[writingbyebonio.livejournal.com]

Thank you! There seems to have been a small but growing trend of Sam/Gabriel fics and fans, I guess to compliment the big Dean/Castiel trend, and I just happened to get inspired by a comment!fic prompt, as these things go. LOL. Definitely not a pairing I could see myself writing a lot of, but an interesting experiment.